Tag Archives: fear of the unknown

HELP! I don’t know!

  • I dont know

I have felt stuck with a feeling of “I don’t know” for a week now and the drawing of the Blackbird earlier this week only seemed to emphasise that for me. Today, I decided to ask for some HELP (and read that with a tone of desperation!) to provide me with some direction for moving forward.


Chalk pastel on paper

My process

  1. Intention: Help me!
  2. I did a guided meditation on meeting your spiritual guides.
  3. I put on some music and then started to draw with my eyes closed using my non-dominant hand to get me out of my head.
  4. After I finished the drawing I was surprised by what I had drawn as I couldn’t make out what the image was, however I felt drawn to the energy of the image.
  5. I then sat down and did some journal writing about my process and the art.

In the meditation I met with a being who looked like me. She was lovely and cupped my face in her hands and told me that all paths lead to one; it doesn’t matter which one I take and to do the online course I was thinking about if that is what I wanted to do.

When I started drawing I used my right hand so that I couldn’t really think about what I was trying to draw. I drew 3 red blobs in the centre of the page. After that I spent a lot of time drawing the waves of gold all around, which felt good. I then went back and worked on the blobs as I felt I needed to make each one more distinct from the others with different colours.

I named this art: I don’t know, because I just don’t know!

In accepting that I don’t know, I felt a huge relief wash over me. I realised that it was ok to not know, and perhaps far better than knowing because I only seem to think of the negative knowns when it comes to writing.

Perhaps then my fear is not of the unknown, but of not knowing which of the things I do know about that I don’t want, that might happen, and my perceived inability to control those things?

There is freedom in not knowing. I can open up to the joy of just creating and feel curious at what comes up for me.

Knowing creates expectations and pressure to achieve those expectations I place upon myself, all the while worrying about not being in control of ensuring that I prevent all of the known things I don’t want. This causes me to freeze and close up.

This image feels light and bright. There is support. There is hope. There is the gift of discovering the unknown by opening myself up to receiving something new.

If you are interested in reading more about my process, click on link below to read my journal notes:



With this art, I sat down and thought about fear, and what that might mean in the context of ‘fear of the unknown’.

I see two images within the art:

  1. A bird that appears a bit startled or has pulled up suddenly as it notices the golden threads streaming down around it.
  2. A face with mouth wide open looking in the opposite direction to the bird, with its back to the golden threads. It is looking straight ahead, and seems to be talking/eating in an all-consuming manner.

The message:

All things new that come into your awareness may take a bit of time to adjust to. The change in awareness is what is making you a bit unsteady and uncomfortable right now. Don’t jump to conclusions or start to listen to the fear monologue.

Take a moment to process what is happening around you. If it still feels ok and looks ok, it is. Trust it.

I have had a lot of resistance come up despite the messages of this art since completing the piece. I am still working through that as I feel stuck.

If you are interested in finding out more about what came up for me during this process, click on the link below to access my journal notes.

The Healing Waterfall – Art Process Notes

Journal notes: Thursday 1 August 2019

I’ve been feeling under the weather with a cold today and my energy is low. I didn’t feel up to connecting with soul again to find out more about this story, so I simply asked for some healing energy to come to me.


Chalk pastels on mixed media paper

My process

  1. I put on some ‘healing meditation music’ and set up my art space.
  2. I closed my eyes and simply asked for some healing energy to come through.
  3. I then started to draw.
  4. After I finished the drawing I sat down and did some journal writing reflecting on the art piece.
  5. The story of the bird and water was written as a summary of my insights into the art.

What came up for me during the process

The bird holds the creative energy within and it is quite contained. The spiritual energy moves freely around the bird, however the two are yet to meet or touch one another.

The message: let go and allow the energy in so that the transformation can begin. It’s an alchemical process, and my mind is the one holding me back.

If you would like to read more about what came up for me during the process of creating this art, click on the link to read my journal notes.

The healing waterfall

The healing waterfall

Let go and allow the healing energy in so that the transformation can begin.

The little bird stood stiffly as the healing waters of the universe flowed down around her. She felt uncomfortable with the power that surrounded her and without her wings she could not fly away.

Must I stay in this strange place when all I want is to feel better?, she wondered.

Invite me in little bird, the waters of the cosmos whispered kindly.

I can’t! she cried.

Yes, you can. Drink me in and let the healing journey home begin, the waters replied.

The little bird hesitated; something was holding her back. If the healing really was as simple as allowing the energy in then what is stopping me, she wondered.

Her mind was quick to reply FEAR OF THE UNKNOWN. We cannot control that which we do not know.

Ahh that old chestnut, the little bird sighed.